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Tuesday, 19 March 2013

I go to a bar to have fun, not to talk, dance or drink

Posted on 23:00 by Unknown
Imagine that you walk to a single girl in a bar.
- Hi, would you like some drink?
- No, I'm just having fun.
- You mean listening to music?
- No, I don't care about music, I'm just here for fun.
- Would you like to dance?
- Nooo! I'm here to have fun.
- Are you waiting for someone?
- Get lost already nolifer! What's so hard in understanding that I just want to have fun?!

A weird conversation isn't it? Now let's say you are on the phone with a buddy.
- Hi, any plans for tonight?
- Yes, I go to the cinema.
- I like movies too, we can go together. Would you like to see the new action movie?
- Those aren't my thing. I just want to have fun.
- OK, comedy then!
- Nope, I just want some fun.
- Maybe romantic movies are your thing.
- Dude. Please. I'm not a hardcore like you. I just want to hang out and have some fun.

No one had such conversation, right? Cinemas, bars, football fields, bowling clubs are all places where you go for fun, yet not a single person would utter the word "fun" there. They already decided what kind of activity is their fun and they go directly for that activity.

There is only one place where uttering the words "I do it for fun" is common: sex, where it has an explicit meaning "I don't want relationship." This distinction is needed because the socially default form of sex is in a loving relationship. The reason why people use the "just for fun" statement for sex is to somewhat avoid the social stigma related to that. Saying "I don't even like you but I'm horny" would be much less acceptable, yet much more true. There is no need to use this trick in the cinema, since watching any kind of popular movies are OK, so one can openly say the truth: "I want to see an action movie". In the case of video games the situation is similar to the sex case. The pure truth would be embarrassing, that's why people use the generic and positive term "fun". The pure truth would be "I'm bad in the game, so I don't even attempt to win, I just want to kill time". Small kids who are unaware of its social stigma gladly say "I don't know, I'm just playing" when you ask what exactly Barbie do on the top of the firefighter truck with a gun in her hands. Older people are aware of the social stigma of "loser" so they try to avoid it by the "for fun" statement. If the truth wouldn't be shameful, they could be more precise on what are they doing.

My point is that the "for fun" people are aware of their loser status, try to avoid the stigma and fight back by labeling non-losers as "no lifers" or "no fun people".
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